The car pirouettes in mid-air, appearing as if from nowhere, as if transported via some futuristic technology, teleporting into view above the opposite carriage way, twirling in the air like a wind blown leaf. It spins back to the asphalt and lands catlike on its wheels, stretching across both lanes of the opposite dual carriageway, its bodywork sagging and crumpled, wheels sunk into their arches like tortoise heads.
The bonnet is accordioned, disclosing the point of impact, the point at which the car must have collided with the crash barrier? The verge? Another car? We pass at 70 or 80 miles an hour, the crash barrier between us and the car planted diagonally across two lanes of approaching traffic. Inside, a man, eyes wide, hair frenzied on his head, stares at something in the back seat.
As quick as that – no – quicker, we pass the scene and go on our way. A lorry behind us flashes a warning at the traffic approaching in the opposite lanes. A few miles down the road we pull off to the services and sip strong, sweet coffee and don’t talk. When we get back in the car to make our way further up the motorway, we try not to think about the car fighting gravity with momentum, revolving in the air almost peacefully. We try not to think about hitting the ground.
17 Responses to Barrel Roll – #fridayflash
I got the shivers. This is a terrific description of a strange moment, something completely out of the ordinary yet apparently very possible. I have to ask: did it really happen?
Excellent description in this. Good story!
Nicely descriptive, sufficiently ambiguous, and a perfect length.
@Jen – yes, it did really happen. We were on a motorway drive recently – heading to a holiday home with the kids. Luckily the kids were looking out the other window. I looked across and it did seem to have appeared in mid-air like that. Weird thing was there was no sound. We saw cars in the other carriageway slowing and an ambulance heading that way minutes later.
Details like the man in the car were made up. I also changed the story to have only a couple in the car, no kids. It did shake me up though and we did stop for a coffee at the first opportunity.
It was weird seeing it happen but not seeing why. Also, we felt kind of helpless as, on the other side of the motorway, there was nothing we could do.
Excellent description of a surreal experience. I appreciate the length of the piece, as quick as the accident itself and, like the accident itself, leaves you feeling that while there should be more, you really don’t know what it should be.
An instant out of time, frozen forever. This would be the ultimate horrorshow for driving classes in highschool.
Way too believeable.
Barb Relyea
Good description of wreck. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a car land catlike before, sagging body and crumpled–not very catlike–but familiar.
Wow great descriptions – well done
Kapow! Powerful stuff. FANTASTIC opener. You’re so very good at this Dan.
What Chris said!
Fabulous description and I really get a feel of “there but for the grace of god…”
It’s amazing how time can warp in moments requiring more attention. That’s what this bit does—it slows time down to a manageable dribble so the action can be properly digested. Well done and thank yuh.
Love the slo-mo feel to what surely happened in a nanosecond. Reminds me of a scene I read last night in LET THE GREAT WORLD SPIN by Colum McCann. Both eery and surreal. Peace, Linda
Powerful, gripping writing that says something deeply human – even when terrible things happen around us, sometimes all we can do – the best thing to do – is carry on driving.
You described a surreal moment well. That point in time becomes embedded in your mind like a photograph.
Your mastery of description is very evident here. “…twirling in the air like a wind blown leaf” is excellent visual prompt!
Ergh, thought this might be real – interesting, how the flow was spot on but “time” slowed just be amount of detail and descriptions. Excellent.
I’ve seen this kind of thing happen before, although not quite like that. I saw a truck hit a deer. The deer was running across the field, running full bore, a gorgeous buck in full, beautiful flight… it ran straight into the path of an oncoming pickup truck and was killed instantly. The thing I couldn’t get over (as in your story) was how vibrant and alive life was in one second, and how void of life the crumpled body of the deer was one nanosecond later. A real life lesson in how lightning fast it happens and how you are powerless to stop it.
Beautiful story, Dan, really breathtaking. Thanks.
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