Something a bit different this week. Clearing out my virtual writing desk over New Year, I came across a handful of micro/hintfiction competition entries I wrote in 2009. Though I did receive a nice email about one of the following micro fictions, none of the following were successful in their respective competitions. I remain quite fond of these little stories so thought, for my first #fridayflash of 2010, I would let them out into the wild. Be gentle, they’re only little.
The Other Shoe.He sat with one shoe off and one shoe on, unsure of whether he was coming or going. She refused to help by saying something.
On The Shelf
If he wasn’t six inches tall, fixed to base, unable to speak, he would tell her he loved her. At least he thinks so.
Fading
Anna lay unresponsive in the bed. Silences had long been part of their marriage, ructions causing her to act as if Tom simply wasn’t there. Anna would never acknowledge it but, watching his image in the bedroom mirror grow slowly more transparent, Tom knew this time things were serious.
Lie
It leaves her lips easily. Tomorrow she will do something other than what she says she will. The day following she will regret ever uttering it. She will hate herself for speaking it and him for believing. What dialogue remains in their relationship will be subtitled by the lie.
Locked In
Aged six, I locked myself in the bathroom, ignoring instructions to leave the key alone. Dad splintered the frame, punting the lock through the soft wood of the door frame. Grown up now, I still find myself in traps of my own making, waiting for a size twelve boot to save me.
“The Other Shoe” was my favourite, it made me laugh.
I also really liked “Lie” – ‘subtitled’ is the perfect choice of word.
I enjoyed the philosophical tone of “Locked In”.
I enjoyed each of those. They each said something profound in such a tiny amount of words. The Other Shoe, though, was my favorite. Made me laugh out loud.
hey, they were really cool to read. super short and sharp. The Lie intrigued me.
My favorite was ‘On The Shelf’, I loved the emotion you created in just two lines. It’s a gift to be able to make people understand tales much larger than what is actually written down here. This was refreshing, I enjoyed it very much.
Thank you for these ‘small plates’. I savored each, especially LOCKED IN. If only we always had fathers to save us…
(I DO hope RS has another hint fiction antho; mine also are lying in a folder, missed the deadline due to personal stuff).
Peace, Linda
Fading is my favourite, with the Lie and Locked In as joint seconds!
Nice pieces all, but I really liked locked in. Maybe because that actually happened to me (though my Dad was more of a size 9).
~jon
I love these, and they’re a great reminder that an economy of words does not equal an economy of thought.
“What dialogue remains in their relationship will be subtitled by the lie.”
That is just brilliant. Seriously.
I liked The Lie most of all too. So much in so few words. Glad you let your micros get some air!
I find the comments fascinating. Each has their own favorite, for different reasons.
The Other Shoe was very funny, Locked In spoke volumes to me in a personal way.
Thanks for sharing these!
Thanks for the kind words everyone. Like Laura, I am getting a kick out of seeing who likes which story and why. Thanks for stopping by to check out these little ones.
Ah, very clever Dan,
I think this is a great exercise to do! I love the intrigue each one provokes.
I have to say the Locked In got me too because it brought up quivery feelings in me. I must have issues there.
Thanks – great fun!
Each of these is a gem, tightly worded with just a dose of profundity and giving us just enough to hint at something larger. As a fellow writer of such micro pieces, I commend you on what you’ve got here.
I particularly liked Fading, although they were all good.
I’m glad you let these out. Locked In was my favourite, though I enjoyed them all.